“I’ve been meaning to ask you about this new technology I keep hearing people talk about? “
“Which one? The Google one? Buzz?”
“Um…no…I don’t think its Google… that Blue Berry?”
(she scrunches up her brow and does a little head shake)
“You mean like Cameron has? His phone? His Blackberry?
It’s Blackberry….not a Blueberry“
(I scrunch up my brow identically…and while I am mentally dreaming of pie….I start to detail the difference between a Blackberry, an Android and the iPhone)
She stops me mid-sentence.
“No no. It’s not a phone. But I don’t know why a phone has to do all those things. Why can’t it just be a telephone. I don’t want to text. I don’t want to take pictures. I’m not downloading the top forty”
I try and repress my typical exasperation with this conversation…which we have had dozens of times. My response has been come a worn mantra.
“They aren’t really telephones with special features you know. They are handheld computers that you can ALSO get phone calls on”
Mama doesn’t repress her exasperation as well.
“I’ve heard your argument before. A thousand times before. But why can’t I just have a telephone?”
I think because I embrace smartphone technology she holds me partially responsible.
”Well…You could get a Jitter-Bug telephone.
Those are only phones.”
I’m smiling now…laughing quietly
”Those are for old people”
She’s ticked with me now
”Just tell me about the Blue Berry”
“I don;t think there is a Blue Berry”
I’m trying to figure this out
”Do you mean Blue Tooth?”
“Ummm….maybe. Blue Tooth.
That must be it.
What is the Blue Tooth?”
”Short distance radio wave transmission…it’s the technology which makes all the wireless earpieces work. Hands free cell phones”
”No…that’s not it…”
”Well…okay…then I’m not sure what you are talking about.”
”It is Blue…um…Blueberry….Bluetooth…Blue…something”
she’s totally exasperated now.
”Maybe it’d help if you told me what you are talking about. Where did you hear about it?”
”Apparently all the DVD’s are obsolete now. Just like all the VHS tapes we STILL have. Now we have obsolete tapes and obsolete DVDs and two machines under the TV with the cable box. Do we have to buy ANOTHER machine???”
Ahhhhh….finally, I have a lightbulb moment.
”You mean BluRay!!!”