santa cruz wharf

03 November 2007

Father forgive me...

I’m starting to think the Jehovah’s Witnesses use our street as training camp. For the third time in the past four weeks the same white-hair-up-in-a-bun lady wearing a lacy cardigan has rung my doorbell. Each time with two different people in formation behind her. I make nice…claim my church affiliation…and really REALLY politely decline her insistent offers of propaganda.

This morning the front door was open so I could see them thru the screen door coming up the walk. Tempted to close the door before they got to the porch…I walked over waiting for them to greet me. Before I realized what I was doing…I had picked up the lovely orange with little black bats bowl from the table. Still three-quarters full of Hershey and Mars, I pushed open the screen and asked, “Trick or Treat.”

They didn’t laugh.
They didn’t even smile.

16 comments:

crazy working mom said...

*LOL* Good one! :)
Might be a good thing to keep those by the door in the future.

Travis said...

I love that response!

Oswegan said...

You should try to save them next time.

~Oswegan

craig andrew said...

LOL! I lived in a neighborhood that was infested with them once... I was in college and they must of thought us vulnerable or something and they just kept coming back. One day we saw tehm at our neighbors house and decided once and for all to take care of the issue. All five roommates, three girls and two boys stripped naked and waited for them. They rang the doorbell, we opened the door and invited them in, but oddly... they didn't want to come in.... we could figure it out C;)

Jeff B said...

Price of a bag of Halloween candy - $7.50

Getting a Jehovah's Witness to leave you alone - priceless

I love it!

Mel said...

LOL

Absolutely priceless!

Matt-Man said...

Ha...Classic. I love when they stop me. Always fun telling them that I am Jesus Christ. Cheers!!

Desert Songbird said...

Between your bag of candy and Matt's claiming to be Christ ("Matt-siah"), it's difficult to find a more amusing way of getting the JDs to back off.

Twisted. Very twisted.

I love it.

katherine. said...

CWMom: the chances of a bowl of candy remaining uneaten are....none....smile

travis: unexpected - even by me.

oswegan: I have quoted scripture to them....they acted like I had said nothing.

craig: you were probably the object of prayer and discussion for WEEKS.

jeff: hopefully they will skip us next time...

mel: good post Halloween use of the bowl??

Matt: is THAT why you have all those lightening burns on the porch?

DSongbird: laughing...this blogworld is just a bit twisted for sure.

Linda said...

How many times do they knock on the same door before they finally get the message that you are simply NOT interested. I'm afraid I've been so rude in the past to yell "go away" out my open living room window so I didn't have to get up and answer the door. I like your method better, though! Hope it worked and they don't come back but if they do, ask them if they're Christmas caroling and if they take requests!

Mags said...

I always ask who it is before I open the door. Once, they told me and I wasn't in the mood to be "saved" so I told them I was naked and couldn't come to the door.

The lady said, "Ok honey, you take care of yourself now" and left. They haven't been back since!

Amazing Gracie said...

Oh my gosh! That's hysterical!!!
Unfortunately, they've been so brainwashed, they don't even understand that they're a CULT!
A lady I worked with had an ex who married one, and she refused to let his children have any sort of birthday celebrations. ARGHHHH! It's an "all about me" religion.
Ick.

Gordie said...

I've always thought, if I had enough time on my hands and malice in my heart, it might be fun to find an antiquarian bookseller that had some copies of the Watchtower from fifty years ago. And then, when the JW's came calling, I could invite them in and discuss it with them. "Do you realise the world is going to end in 1974? How do you feel about that?"

Misty Dawn said...

My husband was gone for a month getting things ready for our move. I was home by myself and my male dog was extremely protective. They came knocking on my door, and I politely explained to them that they should not come up on my porch again because my dog would go through the window. They ignored me and proceeded to ask me if I realized that this was the end of the world. Finally, I said "Look, if you come up on my porch again, my dog WILL make it the end of your world!

My Semblance of Sanity said...

HHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAH

red tin heart said...

i am laughing so hard right now!!! you are my kinda girl. xoxo nita