santa cruz wharf

05 February 2007

Manic Monday ~ "Drifting"

(like Morgen…I thought of the people who have drifted out of my life)

As I get older (rolling my eyes) I am reflecting on how people drift away from each other. There have been many close friends in my life, from whom I have completely lost contact. I have just drifted away from them…or allowed them to drift away from me. Probably the former. I am truly one of the world’s worst correspondents…I come from two long lines of literary letter writers…and yet I can’t seem to even keep up with my Christmas Card list. (sigh)

To some extent it is a product of not living in the same place for my entire life. My college roommate and I live on opposite sides of the country. I occasionally track her career online...and yet haven’t spoken to her in way over a decade. The neighbors with whom I shared meals five (…eight…ten…) times a week now live 400 or more miles away. The co-workers who knew me better than most are now…where? Who knows? In a few cases the drifting is a result of getting a divorce…or of the kids growing up and not having that constant interaction with other parents. Oh MY, we shared so many monumental events and memories. They were so important to me in the moment….and they have now drifted off on so many different currents.

Truly there are a couple people from whom I have gladly cut off all ties. And an extended family member or two that I wish I could distance myself from (just kidding…well…sorta…) ….but there are several individuals who I regret having allowed to drift away.

Friendships…all relationships for that matter….take a certain degree of effort to maintain. A cold hard look results in the realization that I rarely pursue friendships. If someone engages me…then I become an incredibly loyal and active friend. But if you start to drift away…then I will the tide take you away from me.


JohnH985 said...

Very nice post. I can sympathize. It's easy to let people drift out of your life. I've done it more times than I care to think of.

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

friendship takes lots of hard work through the years. nothing that wonderful is that easy!

smiles, bee

Mel said...

Isn't it amazing how letting our fingers talk we get to learn some truths about ourselves?

Great stuff you shared here!

Skittles said...

Very well said.. I think we've all done that..

katherine. said...

john: it is too easy... gotta figure a way to anchor some of them.

Bee HRH: the long time friends I have managed to tie down are well worth it.

Mel: thanks....and yeah...maybe a little TOO

Ms. Skit: human nature? or maybe a sign of the times?

Morgen said...

That's a heartfelt post -- I am, as you know, sharing some of those same feelings. People drifting in and out of our lives -- I wish I could be more philosophical about it, but instead I find myself just entangled in the past and being melancholy.
Thanks for sharing such an intimate part of your self with us for Manic Mondays.
~ Manic Mo