take your mommy to work day

I have actually experienced a fluctuation in the space time warp continuum.
I am left shocked and shaken.
I need to speak with Q.

My all-grown-up daughter Rhiannon lives and works in The City ( that’s San Francisco for those of you who don’t know what we cool Californians mean when we say “The City”.) She manages operations for a company up there in the financial district. They have a little office here in Santa Cruz. She and a couple of her co-workers came to town for the day.

In my truest Lorelei Gilmore fashion… I get all giddy and bail out of work early, to have lunch and spend a bit of time with my daughter. I just don’t get to see her often enough to let this kind of opportunity pass me by.

As I stepped through the doorway into the office where she was working …I felt a jolt of energy and the room kinda rocked and the lights sorta flashed. Not that unusual here in earthquake country. But no one else seemed to notice. Hmmm.

After hugging my baby with greetings and introductions all around….my daughter pointed to a desk on the edge of the room by the window…and told me I could hang out there. Cool. Laptop in hand…I set myself up…I needed to check in at my office.

I overheard her colleagues saying things like, "oh your Mom is so cute" ….and "she is just like you"…"you guys talk exactly the same" et cetera. She laughed….and I could hear her telling them funny little stories about me. (oh geez Rhiannon….don’t tell them THAT) I focused on my laptop….pretending not to hear. I’m patting my little self on my back for wearing a trendy outfit, combing my hair, and wearing makeup. Atta girl.

Wanting to check voicemail (I’m not obsessive…but I had left work in the midst of a small crisis. It wasn’t a convenient day to go AWOL…but the Mommy instinct took precedent over any sort of work obligation). I walked over to another desk to use the closest telephone.

“What are you doing?” This exasperated voice came out of my daughter’s mouth. Her eyebrows arched and her hands on her hips. I felt as if I had got caught with my hand in the cookie jar.

My response of “I was just making a call” sounded damn near whiney. I don’t whine. With a dejected put upon air…I put the receiver down and sulked back to “my” desk. Sheesh…it’s not like I was rifling through confidential documents or anything.

I had crossed over into some bizarre reverse parallel universe. Or maybe into one of those freaky Disney mother / daughter switch movies.

It was almost 1pm and not being a big breakfast kinda gal….I was starting to feel the rapid approach of the low sugar bitch. I strolled innocently into the coffee room. Looking in the fridge….opening the cabinets….poking around for a stray donut, bagel, or muffin. (yeah yeah…I only wanted the donut…but at that point in my desperation…I woulda settled for something healthy)

Again the voice. “Mommy…what are you looking for?”

Feigning nonchalance…dragging the toe of my shoe on the floor….I ask “…aren’t you getting hungry yet?” (I refrained from calling her SugarCookie while she was being all professional…but just barely) She gave me a look I am fairly certain she has seen on my face two or three hundred times. I responded with perfect innocence, “whaaaaaaaat?”

Finally…we went out to lunch. We both require straws for our water. We both ordered the exact same thing…we request identical substitutions. We speak to the waitress in the same cajoling be-nice-to-me-I-tip-well tone of voice. She grilled me about my date on Saturday. She has a few choice tidbits of advice. WhatEVER.

And then…she picked up the check.
Okay...that’s kinda cool…I can handle that.

Back at the office, I sat at “my” desk trying...really REALLY TRYING…to be well behaved. I’m getting bored and fidgety. One of the guys asked Rhiannon if I would like some chocolate. What a kiss ass. She graciously gave him permission to generously share the Godiva. I guess I was a good girl and finished my lunch.

I said thank you.
I smiled.

But I was thinking, “Where the hell were you and your little stash of chocolate when I was starving….and why the e’ph are you asking HER?”

The game is “Mother May I?”
The game is NOT “Daughter May I?”

Yes, you may.

Her boss came over bearing gifts. I now have a pen, a mug, and a thermos all with the company logo. Cool. Party Favors. Collectors Items. They told me I need to come back again and how much they love Rhiannon. What a great asset to the company she is. I positively BEAM. Proud Mommy. I am sure they think I am lots of fun and very well behaved. We are having a lovely conversation about how wonderful it is to live in Santa Cruz.

Rhiannon with the exasperation again…telling me to sit still and be quiet because she had work to do before we could leave. I tried giving HER the look. She ignored me….she was the one in charge here. Sheesh.

Next time I’m there…I swear….I’m gonna spin in the chair.