the fathers

As I looked through these pictures I was struck how very little these men have in common…these men who play the role of “Father” in my life.

my own father
my grandfathers
my step father
and the fathers of my children

(please note:  even as a one year old my eyes automatically closed when the shutter opened.  )

I’m going to see my Father later this week for some paper signing.  It has been quite some time since we have been together.  For most of my life, family wisdom was that my sister is artistic, kind, and curly like our mother…and that I am our “father’s daughter. ”

I do carry my Father’s strong genetic imprint.  My countenance, my temperament and my talents come from him.  My brother and I both.  Ironically, it was in my Father’s grief-ignited breakdown 
to make our life situations identical, which resulted in our estrangement.

My childhood and teenage years were pretty great. I grew up in a wonderful home with many advantages.  Month long vacations to national parks and family events were a  priority. There was never any question that each of us would be sent to college.  And while it was a Father-mandated location… it was also a parental-funded education. My Father was a life long engineer…an intelligent and generous man.  There was never any doubt that he loved me, my brother, and my sister.

This is my first Fathers’ Day without a living Grandfather…and my Mama’s first Fathers’ Day without her Father. (funny guy below on the left) If you’ve been around here the past year you’ve read a few posts about the man he was and his legacy for our family.


I was named after my Father’s Father. (funny guy above on the right)  His first name was Clare…my middle name is Claire.  He taught me about the railroad…and how to fish. His example of love for my Grandmother taught me how a husband should be.  He was always trying to set me up with some young man in town. I haven’t posted about him much…he has been gone a long time now.  I will have to remedy this oversight.  
  
After church I met the fam and some friends for brunch at one of my StepFathers’s favorite hangouts… the restaurant at the local golf course.  They have great food…but the interior design is that of a 1970’s retirement home cafeteria. 

My StepFather hasn’t ever actually played golf.  But he does have some very specific restaurant criteria. He knows the guy who runs the place…so we always get seated no matter how crowded…they have a full bar…and “the waitresses have good breasts.” 

Little Missy and The Cub have each grown into pieces of their Father.  He still calls for advice or to lament over something one of the kids have going on.  I am the go-to-girl for medical issues, school, and affairs of the heart. He knows they both call me to help convince him to do something they want.  I’d like to think I play the role of advocate and peacemaker… but it is more accurate to think along the lines of a sneaky, double-crossing, secret agent. 

SugarCookie’s Father is the only man who convinced me to marry…and he was barely out of boyhood at the time.  We have been divorced for almost twenty years. We see each other at graduations, funerals, and when our daughter needs both of us.  My daughter is an awful lot like her Dad..which is mostly a good thing.  smile.  Thank God she takes after me where baseball is concerned (Go Giants!) I don’t know what I would do if I had given birth to a Dodger fan. He and I talk when there is something really good or really bad to discuss.  He is the father who made me a mother… and for that I am eternally grateful.

Wishing all of you Fathers a very Happy Day!